Lumi / For parents
Zones of Regulation at home: a guide for parents
If your child came home saying “I’m in the yellow zone,” their school is probably using The Zones of Regulation, a framework created by occupational therapist Leah Kuypers, who began developing it in 2008. Here is what the colors mean and how to back it up at home.
The four zones
The framework sorts feelings and energy levels into four colors. In everyday terms:
- Blue: low energy. Sad, tired, bored, sick.
- Green: calm and ready. Focused, content, okay.
- Yellow: energy going up. Worried, frustrated, silly, wiggly.
- Red: very big feelings. Furious, terrified, out of control.
No zone is bad. The aim is to notice which zone you’re in and know what helps there. For the official materials and wording, see the Zones of Regulation site.
How to use it at home
- Use the same color words as school, so your child hears one language in both places.
- Name your own zone out loud: “I’m in yellow, I need a minute.”
- Ask “what zone?” before “what happened?”
- Don’t use red as a label for bad behavior. It describes a feeling, and every feeling is allowed.
Exercises that fit each zone
These are Lumi exercises, not part of the Zones curriculum. They practice the same skill: noticing a feeling and doing something that helps.
Blue: wake the body up
Superhero Pose
This exercise uses the connection between body and mind to help children feel steadier. When children stand in a strong, open pose, their body can send the brain a message: “I’m safe enough to try.” This helps them move forward even when Fear or Doubt is still nearby.
- Notice the Shrinking Feeling. Explain that when we feel nervous, Fear or Doubt may try to make us smaller: shoulders down, head low, body curled up.Say: “Have you noticed how your body tries to get tiny before something big? It’s like Fear is whispering, “Hide. Be small.” Let’s just notice it.”
- Build the Strong Base. Ask your child to place their feet shoulder-width apart and press them gently into the floor. This is the base of their superhero stance.Say: “Let’s build your superhero stance from the ground up. Put your feet apart and press them into the floor. Imagine strong roots growing from your feet down into the ground.”
- Superhero Pose. Now move into the pose in front of the mirror: hands on hips, elbows out, chest open, chin slightly lifted.Say: “Hands on your hips, shoulders back, chest wide. Your body is big enough for two feelings at once. A brave one and a nervous one. Look in the mirror. Check out that superhero!”
- Slow Hero Breaths. Hold the pose for 30 seconds to a minute. During this time, just breathe slowly and notice what changes inside. If nothing changes, that’s okay too.Say: “Let’s stay like this for a little while, like a superhero on a comic book cover. Breathe slowly. Fear can come along, but in this pose, you’re way bigger than your fear.”
- Step Into Action. Finish by keeping the feeling of open shoulders and steady feet as your child moves into the real task. Practice at home on easy days first, then try it before something harder, like a test, a game, or a new place.Say: “Remember this feeling in your body. You don’t have to wait for Fear to go away. You can bring it with you and still take the next step.”
Green: keep it going
Gratitude Circle
This exercise helps children find small good things, even on hard days. They learn that a hard day can still hold moments worth noticing. This builds resilience without forcing them to “be positive.”
- Time for the Magic Flashlight. Sit together before bed, during dinner, or at another quiet moment. Explain that attention is like a flashlight. It can help us find small treasures hidden inside the day.Say: “Sometimes our brain only remembers the bad stuff. Let’s turn on our Magic Flashlight and look for small good moments from today.”
- Welcome the Hard Feelings. If the day was hard, your child may not want to name anything good. Don’t force cheerfulness. First, accept how they feel. On a really hard day, one tiny treasure is enough.Say: “Sounds like Sadness came along today and says everything was bad. That’s okay. Hard days happen. We can say, “I hear you, Sadness.” And we can still look for tiny treasures. Even one tiny treasure counts.”
- Find Three Treasures. Ask your child to name up to three things they feel thankful for today. Keep it small and real: warm socks, a funny picture, a hug, finishing something hard.Say: “What are three things from today you feel thankful for? They can be tiny, like a sunny spot on the wall, a yummy drink, or that you kept trying.”
- Feel the Warmth. After naming the treasures, invite your child to notice whether the thankful feeling shows up anywhere in the body. There’s no right answer.Say: “When you remember these things, do you feel it anywhere in your body? Maybe warmth in your chest, a smile in your cheeks, or something soft in your tummy. Let’s take a slow breath and notice. If you don’t notice anything, that’s okay too.”
- Close the Circle. End with a small gesture: a hug, a high five, a special handshake, or one shared slow breath.Say: “Let’s tuck these treasures away and take them into tomorrow. Today had hard parts, and it had good parts too. Both are true.”
Yellow: slow down
Candle Breathing
This playful breathing exercise teaches children to slow down their body with a long, gentle breath out. It helps when a restless or worried feeling shows up and gives your child a simple way to feel steady again. Practice it first when your child is calm, so it’s easier to use when feelings are big.
- The Magic Candle. Ask your child to hold up one finger as a pretend candle.Say: “Let’s pretend your finger is a magic candle. What color is it today? Look at the little flame. It wiggles with even the tiniest breath.”
- Gentle Breath In. Before breathing toward the candle, take a slow breath in through the nose. It doesn’t need to be big. The slow breath out is what matters most.Say: “Put your hand on your belly. Breathe in gently through your nose. You don’t need a huge breath. Just a nice, slow one.”
- Make the Flame Dance. Now breathe out slowly through softly rounded lips. The goal is not to blow the candle out, but to make the flame gently move.Say: “Now breathe out very slowly, like you want the flame to dance but not go out. Long and gentle. That’s it.”
- Breathe with the Visitor. If your child is upset, name the feeling you notice and invite it to sit nearby and watch the candle breathing.Say: “Looks like Worry came to watch. Worry likes fast, puffy breaths. Let’s show it our slow, gentle breath.”
- A Quiet Moment. After 5–7 breaths, pause and ask your child what they notice in their body.Say: “One last slow breath, and now we softly blow the candle out. Close your eyes for a second. What do you notice in your body now? It’s okay if nothing changed.”
Red: let it settle
Snow Globe
Your child imagines being a snow globe. When feelings get big, it’s like someone shook the globe, and thoughts swirl around like glitter. By staying as still as they can and breathing slowly, your child watches the glitter settle on its own. The glitter doesn’t disappear. It just settles at the bottom. A real snow globe or glitter jar works especially well for younger kids. Practice on calm days first, so it’s easier to use when feelings get big.
- Shake the Globe. Show your child a snow globe or glitter jar, or ask them to imagine one. Shake it together and watch the glitter fly around. Explain that when feelings get big, our thoughts can swirl just like this.Say: “Look at all that glitter flying around! That’s what it can feel like inside when you’re upset. Lots of thoughts, all spinning at once.”
- Watch the Glitter Swirl. Name a few “glitter thoughts” together. Keep it light. Each sparkle can be a thought, a worry, or a busy feeling. There’s no need to fix any of them.Say: “Each sparkle is like a thought. What thoughts are spinning around in your head right now? Let’s name a couple.”
- Be Still Like a Globe. Invite your child to stay as still as they can, like a snow globe sitting on a shelf. Perfect stillness isn’t the goal. Wiggles are okay. Breathe slowly together.Say: “Let’s be snow globes on a shelf. Stay as still as you can. Wiggles are okay! Breathe in slowly. Now breathe out slowly.”
- Let It Settle. Watch the glitter slowly float down, in the real jar or in your imagination. Point out that the glitter doesn’t disappear. It’s all still inside the globe. It just settles at the bottom. Thoughts can work the same way.Say: “Look, the glitter is floating down, little by little. It’s not gone. It’s just resting at the bottom. Your thoughts can rest there too.”
- A Clear View. When most of the glitter has settled, notice together how much easier it is to see through the globe. Ask an open question about how your child feels now. If the glitter is still swirling, that’s okay too.Say: “Now we can see through the globe again. How do you feel inside now? If it still feels swirly, that’s okay. We can wait a little longer.”
Two things that pair well with the zones at home: a printable feelings chart and a calm-down corner.
Lumi is a set of self-help exercises for families. It isn’t a treatment and doesn’t replace a pediatrician or a child psychologist. If you’re worried about your child’s safety, call 988 or your local emergency number.
The Zones of Regulation® is a registered trademark and the intellectual property of Leah Kuypers and The Zones of Regulation, Inc. Lumi is not affiliated with or endorsed by them.
Sources
- How it works, The Zones of Regulation.
Questions parents ask
What are the four Zones of Regulation?
Blue for low energy such as sad or tired, green for calm and ready, yellow for rising energy such as worried or silly, and red for very big feelings such as furious or terrified.
Is the red zone bad?
No. No zone is bad. The colors describe feelings and energy, and the aim is to notice your zone and know what helps.
How can I use Zones of Regulation at home?
Use the same color words as school, name your own zone out loud, ask “what zone?” before “what happened?”, and practice one calming skill on calm days.
